Mar. 8th, 2010

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Very proud of myself today; managed to get to the charity and stay the entire day, despite being awake most of the night from coldness/churny stomach feelings/angst. Angst has been depriving me of sleep an awful lot recently; on Tuesday I spent most of night shaking and crying and thinking some very morbid thoughts. Earlier that day, I became embroiled in a rather vicious in-couple fight, where I was effectively banned from seeing a male friend because his girlfreind doesn't trust him to be alone with another girl. Which was upsetting enough in itself, but I have gone out of my way to be extra-nice to this girl, and I feel pretty hurt that she thinks I would consider seducing her boyfriend (who also happens to be a good friend of my ex, who I wouldn't want to hurt either). Do I really come across as that much of a bitch that it would be conceivable I would do such a thing? Perhaps I should work harder at being a nice person. Ironically, the boy has come on to me several times before (when very, very drunk), and I've always had to calm the situation down. Also, I've always felt a rather in awe of the girl as I have always considered her to be far prettier/better dressed/cooler than me, and so has often inspired all kinds of insecurities in me.

Hmm, have I used the term 'Irony; correctly in the above writing?

As I've been typing this entry, a song has come on the radio which contains the lyrics, "When I was 17, I had wrists of steel, and I felt complete". This doesn't really chime with my experience of being 17, but I really like it none the less- especially the resulting mental image of a floppy-haired indie boy with bionic metal wrists.

Also, how big are the paws on this cat?! :


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